Meeting a friend, 35 years later

  • Published
  • By Maj. William McLaury
  • 48th Medical Group
ROYAL AIR FORCE LAKENHEATH --  Long before computers, e-mail or Facebook, I have always enjoyed writing letters and sending photos.

Back in the early to mid 1970s, I attended a consolidated high school in Taylorsville, N.C. During that time I joined a pen-pal club and was excited about the opportunity to write people in foreign countries. I had no idea what lay ahead over the next 35 years.
One individual, a young lady named Renate from what was then West Germany, was the most persistent in corresponding.

We wrote once or twice a month, sharing our experiences of trying to do well in school and many personal family challenges. We felt safe sharing stories about the people in our lives with each other because we had no idea who these other people were. She enjoyed hearing about my lifestyle (at the time I lived on a farm and my father is a magician), enjoyed the photos we would share, and surprised me by saying I had a great sense of humor.

Our letter exchange continued throughout high school and college and even after we each married. We sent photos of our respective children and even supported the other with letters of encouragement when our respective first marriages failed. Interestingly enough, the subject of politics was never an issue for us as we focused on love of family, friendship, and even the idea of seeing each other one day.

Then her letters stopped coming. I did not get responses from her, even after I started writing every month pleading for her to contact me. I knew she was getting my mail because it was nothing was returned. Finally, after about a year of not hearing anything, she sent me a short letter apologizing for not responding to the letters due of family difficulties she preferred to keep confidential. I was very relieved, and over time I noted an emotional healing through her letters.

When I found out I was being stationed in England, the first thing I shared with my wife was that I wanted to meet my pen-pal of more than 35 years. Through ongoing correspondence we decided to meet on New Year's Eve in London.

Needless to say, I was both apprehensive and excited. To me it was like being reunited with a relative you have always heard about and communicated with but never met. Leading up to the meeting, I was anxious. I did not know what to expect or how she would react. I needn't have worried. Our meeting was successful, and I had the honor of meeting a soft-spoken friend that very much felt like meeting a sister after a very long separation.

I also had the honor of meeting Renate's youngest daughter, Sabrina, while they got to meet my wife, Pat, and our youngest son, Michael.

While today we communicate more with e-mail, we continue to write letters and send photos. Our first meeting was a wonderful 'family reunion' which we hope to repeat before I leave the U.K.